It really has been a while- 2 months actually, since I last checked in. And what a 2 months its been. Since my diagnosis with Crohn’s disease nearly 20 years ago and numerous flare ups and attacks, this latest ride with this auto immune disease has been one of the roughest. But I’m glad to say I’m coming out the other side. While I never share really intimate details of my life on the blog, I feel like I owe you all an explanation for my prolonged absence.
Last year I’d been battling feeling off colour, almost monthly flare ups, regular fevers and generally feeling weak, it wasn’t helped by me catching pneumonia in September (and what they thought was TB so I had to take the Meds for that for 6 weeks) and by Christmas my health chaos peaked. It took another few weeks and a bunch of tests to discover the Superbug that kept me in hospital for 30 days two years ago was back! Joy of joys. So for the past few weeks I’ve been taking a hectic antibiotic to try and get it under control and preparing for a Microbiota transplant where all the bad macrobiotics in the gut are transplanted with good ones. Which I had last week. Unfortunately when I went in for the procedure last week, while I was under they discovered that the bug is the least of my worries right now and my formerly contained Chrohns disease is everywhere. My entire colon shows signs of ulceration and inflammation throughout. To be honest when the doctor told me when I came round I just wanted him to knock me out again – knowing what a road I have ahead is daunting and feeling so weak it feels like such a mountain to climb. BUT then I think about people wit REAL iillnesses like cancer and life threatening conditions or those who have lost their children and partners to illness and accidents and I know I need to tell myself to pull myself towards myself and to pull out the big girl panties and put them on!
I’m grateful that we now have a plan and on Friday I had two months worth of immunosuppressants injected at once to try and see if we can whack it and I’ll go in for more next week.
So that’s kind of why I’ve been so scarce lately.
I’ve honestly felt that I’ve had no reserves to offer anyone, nothing to share, nothing to say. It’s been tough on my family, I’m usually in bed by 8.30 every night, meals together haven’t happened in months let alone me cooking much because I can hardly eat and my energy levels are zero. As for a Social life? What’s that?!! The Captain, who is the most social person I know, hasn’t been out in weeks, poor fella and I’m so grateful that he’s in a place where he can talk me through stuff and offer me perspective because I’ve needed it. It hasn’t been easy on him since he’s had to accept that I’m pretty much not up for anything and aside from our incredible housekeeper and second Mom to the girls Pummie keeping things afloat with the girls has been up to him. I’m also starting with a dietitian this week because the irony of this disease is that when you’re ill the only thing you can eat is white food – so I’ve been living on white bread Melrose sandwiches – not exactly very nutritious and now that i’ve had the transplant, there is no point in messing things up with sugar and other rubbish.
As the days go by and I get stronger, I’ll be sharing more on the blog and getting back to business. There are some changes afoot as I mentioned last year but we’ll have to intro those slowly and of course I am infinitely grateful to Mandy for being the rock star writer and kindred information magpie that she is.
This weekend I went for a walk to the Bootleggers near us and it felt like a real milestone and we even went to friends for a Braai for a few hours. Today I’m on my way to our office in town and it will be good to see my colleagues as working only via email sucks! Real world here we come!
So there you have it my lovelies – sorry for my absence, hope you understand and I look forward to sharing lots with you this week! Have a lovely Monday!! V xx